Tag Archives: Kaiology
Baby girl you deserve to be more than Queen for a day
You should be treated like royalty each and every day
There’s no need to accept loyalty on occasion
Or be treated like currency is your only persuasion
On a daily you should be honored and treated with respect
And not be hurt by the one who says your heart they’ll protect
You should be considered right after the Lord
And not kept dangling like a tag on a cord
You should be given flowers and candy more than one day of the year
And not treated like a court date stamped failure to appear
The man who deserves your heart will make the team
You’ll know him because he’ll walk like a King
He will love you with his whole heart and not take it lightly
He will make you feel secure by holding on to you tightly
He will try his best not to disappoint or break your heart
He’d rather disappoint himself or tear his own apart
He will consistently treat you like a Queen
And not talk down to you, cheat on you, or anything in between
Or every now and then do something nice to get you off of his back
Or to throw you off his trail so you won’t be on the attack
You can settle for less if that’s what you so choose
But know that it’s you who will ultimately lose
Why not be treated like more than a Queen for a day
By choosing a King who’ll honor and respect you everyday
I just wanted to share a little something. #KeepFighting
I said that I would
I said that I would heed to the call when I heard it
I said I would do it no matter what
No matter how much fear tried to overwhelm my spirit
No matter how much someone criticized what I am called to do
No matter how much anyone tried to distract me
I said that I would
I said that I would be obedient to your will
I said that I would do it no matter what
I said I’d do it even if you took me in a different direction
Even if I didn’t know where I was going
Even if what I started out doing changes
I said that I would continue
I said that I would
I said that I would do it no matter what
I said that I would do it even if I saw no end result
That I wouldn’t let my eyes disturb your vision
That I would only listen for the sound of your voice
I said that I would
I said that I would keep you first
I said that I wouldn’t get in the way
That I would remain humble to your presence
That I would stay in my place
I said that I would…
Today was an awesome day! But before I tell you about why it was so awesome I have to share with you my slip up. If you’ve been following my blog then you know that I am working to better myself so that I can become my sister’s keeper. First I have to tell you a little about me. I tell you it’s not really easy sharing my faults with people but in order for me to be better and do better I’ve got to put it all out there.
When I’m learning a new task I am the kind of person that can hear something once and I’ve got it; as long as it’s something that’s in my line of work. You don’t have to go into extra detail about why it should be done a particular way because more often than not I have an idea of why a task should be done a certain way. If someone is going into details with a long drawn out conversation my mind will go someplace else. I promise I don’t have adult ADD, I just have so much going on in my mind that it will say “Hey, we already know this” so it will choose to think about something else. When someone starts talking about something I already have an idea of my mind will change course. The saying take what you need and throw away what you don’t is true with my brain! LOL!
Well, here is the kicker. I have to remind myself that everyone is not like me. Sometimes when the shoe is on the other foot and I’m the one in the teaching mode I have to be more detailed and give more information. Sometimes this is hard because if I believe a person should already know this, I can get a little impatient. Today I realized that I can be a little condescending as well. Guess what? I had to pop myself with the rubber band and I also had to apologize for my behavior. I was being condescending to my sister and I felt it and although she didn’t say anything it was my job to not only recognize it, call myself out, and apologize for it. So that was today’s slip up!
Now, on to the awesomeness! A couple of weeks ago a co-worker who I’ve been talking to about my goal of becoming my sister’s keeper (the same one I was being condescending to earlier today) asked me to talk with her freshman volleyball team that she coaches. She said that she wanted me to talk to them because I’m always positive. (Maybe she didn’t really mean always) Anyway, she wanted me to talk with these young ladies because of the negative atmosphere that they were creating at practice. Some of the girls were non-supportive, talking about each other, and being mean to one another. When she asked me if I did speaking engagements I laughed because I thought she was joking but when she said she was serious, I agreed to do it. Although I’ve been speaking out loud in my car and around the house about what I would say to these young ladies for the past couple of days, I have to admit that I was a little anxious.
Before I left work and headed to the girls’ practice I prayed. I prayed that the Creator would give me the words to speak to these young ladies and to let them see him and not me. On the way there I was listening to the CD from The Gospel soundtrack. By the time I got to the girls practice I was ready. The words just flowed! I got down on the floor with them and as an ice breaker I asked them about the reality TV shows that they all had been watching and to tell me something positive from those shows. When I tell you that I was so proud of myself when I was done speaking with them that would be an understatement. I was so proud that the Creator chose me. Me of all people. The one who was condescending earlier. And the one who isn’t perfect. Talking with them confirmed for me that the Creator can use anyone. He could have chosen someone more articulate, or someone who specializes in these types of issues. But he allowed me to be the one and that’s why my day was so awesome!
Below is the song that I was listening to on my way to speak with the team.
Every once in awhile I just let my mind go just so I can see what it is that I am really feeling. As soon as one thought comes, sometimes it goes a little deeper. Here is a part of what I was rambling about the other day while listening to music and typing to the beat…
Sometimes it’s just that one person that has our back no matter what. (The Creator) The one who would dare anyone else to say a negative word about us and they are ready to cause Karma to rain down on the one who does. A lot of people say things are not like they used to be. People are not like they used to be. What happened to the one who would dare to call you friend no matter what? What about the one that said that no one better say anything about you? Where are they at? If you got that, you’ve got a good thing. ( I realize that I do. Thank you God!)
They say it’s lonely at the top, funny thing is I thought the top would be something else, but it’s not. The top is this wonderful feeling that I’m feeling right now. I feel so good right now because I feel like I am on top of the world. I believe the top has many levels and I can’t wait to see if the feeling I am having right now can be topped.
I trust that the Creator loves me no matter what. I think he’s got my back because it couldn’t be anything else. I feel so close to him right now. I think about all the things my friend has pulled me through. There were some dark days. There were some dark times. But he pulled me through.
Have you ever thought that you weren’t going to make it? Like your heart is gonna give out any minute and you’re just waiting for it to stop? Whew! That was hard. There was once a time that I thought I wasn’t gonna make it! I didn’t know what I was gonna do. I went through so many emotions that I can’t even explain them to myself and the one emotion I’m feeling right now is the best! I can’t even explain it to you. I feel like I’m doing something different. I’m doing something I’m supposed to be doing. Like everything that is happening in my life right now somehow is supposed to be happening. I just want to experience it without judgmental eyes. (My own judgemental eyes.) I just want to feel everything that I can. I just want to be so open….my heart is beginning to race right now. My breathing is getting shallower and shallower. You only get one life. One. I’m serious, only one! You can’t come back and do shit! You can’t do nothing. Once it’s over. It’s over. Why can’t you just let yourself be happy? Why won’t you just breath and let yourself go a little and see what happens. If it’s not better than this right here, right now, no love loss because this right here is good. You’ve got this far. Whew! But if you can get a little closer. Just a little more closer and see what happens. Just the mere thought of something better sometimes makes me have to catch my breathe. I feel like my lungs are already taking too much in. The Creator has given me a lot already. When I think back, I think that I was supposed to be dead at least two times that I know of. What about those times I wasn’t even looking. That scares me!
I just wanted to write something. I’ve been…what you call it? “Oh yeah, writers block! I don’t really believe that I had writers block. I think sometimes the Creator has something so good he has for us to write and he has to stop us for a minute so that we can see it…see it real good. Do you know what I mean. He just wants us to slow it down a minute. Take a minute so you don’t miss anything. Sometimes we get so excited and start going and doing. Then the next thing you know, you doing so much that you can even see what you’re doing. Whew, that just juggled my heart a little bit. I had to breathe way deep! Just the thought of doing something great and not actually seeing it was a trip. What are you doing? What are you doing that ‘s making you feel like that? You are feeling like that right? Better than that? No? Ohhh…Man! No, you gotta find it. You gotta feel it too. You’ve got to find something in you that makes you feel positively overwhelmed. Like your life is so good right now that you don’t know if you could take it if it got any better. It’s not fair if I feel it by myself. Man, if we can all just get here, there would be so much peace in the world.
Everything around us is in cahoots to distract us. We are so blind that we don’t even see it. It’s kind of sad. If you mess up they’re aren’t a whole lot of people who will be there to tell you its okay. So what, you messed up. I got you!
I don’t even know whether to dance or write or do both right now because I’m so excited! I’m about to enjoy myself until I can’t. Cause it’s like I said earlier, when it’s over it’s over. You better enjoy it. Whatever it is that you enjoy doing. Don’t let anyone make you feel guilty about it either. Sometimes you could be in so much pain and nobody knows it. You could be in so much pain that you just want to let all the tears in the world roll down your eyes. But it’s okay though because that pain is about growth. You see, you can’t look at the pain in a negative way. You’ve got to look at it as necessary to stay alive. You gotta have the pain to do two things; to let you see the past and to let you see the future at the same time.
Life is so short that there are people out here trying to tell you just how short it is. For real, do what you want to do. Don’t hold yourself up from doing what you were supposed to do because you might be a little afraid or you’re still a little unsure of yourself. You’re different. Yes, that you are. Just do you. Do what you are supposed to do and be you.
So, we’re always told to be ourselves but it’s crazy that most of us are so afraid of being just that. Here goes. I just wanted to kind of feel bad for writing the article I just wrote for examiner because it is so biased. But I feel like Man, forget it. Somebody’s gotta say something. Are we really just gonna keep walking around and nobody’s gonna say nothing? For real. I need to be honest and just tell the truth. Something that I wish someone would’ve told me. I would’ve been a little bit more informed. It wouldn’t have took me this long to get it. And I could’ve made better choices. Do you know what I mean?