Tag Archives: Alzheimers

My Soul Smiles


Today I was given the opportunity to share my accomplishments, hopes, dreams, and latest endeavors with a co-worker. Much to her surprise she had no idea of all the things that I had done and still pray faithfully to do, in what she would call a short time. I shared with her that I felt like I am at the half way point in my life and if I didn’t do those things in which I dream of now, then when. I went on to tell her that my mother was diagnosed with pre-senile dementia when she was 53 years old that later developed into Alzheimer’s. Simply put, that is 10 years from now and if by some chance I should receive the same fate as my mother, I want to have had a life basically worth dying for. Although my mother would live for twenty plus years with Alzheimer’s I do know that in her short time here with us that she did whatever she wanted to do. She lived a full 53 years.  Her diagnosis would give me the fuel to seek out those things in life that I had been dreaming of since I could remember and on the eve of what would be her 77th birthday I get quiet to recognize my own life; where I’ve been and where I am going. Often I have thought that I too would live a short life as she did which in turn made me realize not only how precious life is but how we have to seek out our purpose in life and go for it, guns blazing.  Although it would seem sad that someone had to die so that I could live, I am reminded that it was not the first time.

I wouldn’t say that I’m living so that I could die; but when I’m gone I want to have accomplish more than I could have ever dreamed of. As for today I sit quiet and think of what I want to accomplish in the next ten years and my soul smiles.

Happy Mother’s Day Mom


My Mother

Paulette Ernestine Hall

Mother’s Day

I have been without my mother for the last twenty-four years. Most of that time she was here in the physical but her spirit was long gone. I was nineteen when my mother was diagnosed with Pre-senile Dementia which later would become Alzheimers. My Mother lived twenty-one years with this disease taking away a very lively and vivacious woman, turning her into something totally opposite.  It was tough seeing someone who had portrayed such a strong passion for life; trade it in for something almost non-existent. At one point in my life I felt robbed, during the time I was to come into the person I was going to be, I felt left without instruction. As time grew I came to realize that my Mother had been teaching me in such a short period of time about life and how to enjoy it while you’re here.

My Mother loved life and lived it to its fullest every day that she could.  I can still hear all the wives-tales that she would say and my thinking “What?” and laughing. Now as I am older, I realize that she was leaving me bits and pieces of herself and giving me words that I would live by. Although I have missed her since I was a teen, I have also carried her beautiful smile with me ever since.  The saying goes “You only have one Mother” is without measure and the one I had, was the best one for me. Thank you mother for our time together, the dancing we did will forever be in my heart and spirit. Much Love Queen!