Where’s Kai?


I know that some of you have probably wondered, “where is Kai?”  I’m here. Somewhat in varying degrees of dimensions of what ‘here’ is. I haven’t been on Facebook a lot. Here and there I’ll post but I am in a state of learning and have pulled myself away to get the best education that I possibly can. I’m doing my internal work still, but on a different level.  I haven’t written much because as soon as I think I know a thing I am then charged to bring that level of knowledge, school of thought, or idea even higher. I realize how much I know nothing. How does one speak on things unknown to its fullest. Even now I feel like I’m babbling. I have been in a class of in-depth innerstanding since February of this year. I had planned from October to December of 2017 to do some major things in 2018 and those plans were laid to rest or pushed aside to become more aware of self and Spirituality. I am compelled to dive deeper and go within even more than I ever have.

On Instagram (which I know sounds crazy) but by regranning or sharing most of what I am learning and gathering from the posts of some enlightened souls, I’ve found a sort of refuge. These souls, are relevant to my own innerstanding and have delved into the depths of the mysticisms of their own psyche and schools of thought to find truth by experience. As I type, I find myself forming thoughts about the conversations that I’ve had on Conversations With Kai Mann these past two years and come to the conclusion that now, those conversations do not even begin to scratch the surface of where I am to go now. They were stepping stones to the reality of transformation but transformation as we know it has many levels and its time to take my quest even further. So I sit, get quiet and learn.

I perceive that learning is ever present, it is never ‘all’ or ‘done’ it lasts throughout eternity as we go from one transition or incarnation to another. I find lessons in everything that I do because I look for the lesson in everything that I do. Even in the mundane.  It is all school for thought to be taught from different angles and perspectives.

I’ve stopped most of what I was doing so that I could focus. Outside of a couple of clients I’ve taken life back old school. I knew that I needed a fresh start so I threw away the old canvas, well not really threw it away, I just put it down in the basement so to speak and bought a new canvas.  I’m still thinking if I should throw the old one away but I have started completely over.  I wanted my outer work to reflect  my inner work. I innerstand that I have got to get my house in order. Now earlier, I said that I took it back old school. I’m going to share my truths with you so that you can fully understand because bits and pieces of the truth will only complicate and confuse the lessons.

In February, I delved even deeper into working on my work. I knew that meant that I needed to work on my thinking. The way I have thought over the years have changed me in ways that I don’t recognize or care to take into my future. My inner world had begun to show outwardly and what I saw, I wasn’t too fond of.  I had built walls up from past hurts. I wasn’t that deeply rooted in love spiritually person I had once been. More aloof than ever, energy fully drained and not as focused in areas where I needed to be. Some of my thoughts were immature and unfinished, and I walked around using those thoughts as foundations for major decisions. I decided that I needed to do some things differently and on the next blog post I’ll begin to share exactly what those were.

Why am I’m writing these blogs? Well, I’ve decided to use my blog as an open journal to speak in truth about my transformational journey.  Join me if you’d like.

flyers;

Waldo-Regranned from Eternal Skies

Consciousness- Regranned from Raise The Vibe Tribe

Reflection (2017) Part 2


2017 was like that mother that beat you into submission, but then sat you down to explain ‘why’. Once you understood why it was whipping you into shape, you knew that it wanted you to climb higher into your next level of consciousness.

It was the year that demanded you learn. Learn more about yourself and the world around you. This past year taught me many lessons that I am proud and blessed to have endured, been challenged by, and brought through. It gives me deep satisfaction to say that 2017 gave me pivotal points in my life, and acted as healing in some areas and made me keenly aware of others that needed fixing and or changing. I think the major thing it taught me was that I had assigned tasks to myself that were never my responsibility.

In some spaces I had to forgive myself for not knowing the value of my resources, time and energy. I had to lay hold to forgiveness of myself for sacrificing my worth for some people who didn’t know their own. I had charged some clients the bare minimum in order to obtain their business and had to pay for some of their services out of my own pocket. I took the time to forgive myself for working in collaborative situations where I did 90-95% of the work. Also, I forgave myself for working with clients who weren’t ready for the next level where I or someone on my team had to drag them along kicking, screaming or complaining about why they had to do the work in the first place, or why they had to pay for it, and sometimes doing the work for them. I learned that I had said “You be the gift and let us do the work” too many times. I learned that before you judge someone else, you had to look at yourself first to see if you do the same thing, something similar, or are responsible for why it’s happening.

2017 made me realize just how many tools and resources that we had been given to help us navigate our existence in this world.  Some of or either all of the resources that we were given throughout time many of us have denied ourselves access to because of old wives’ tales, myths, religious, or familial beliefs. Some of these beliefs go back so far that the reason is no longer valid or never was, but we still hold those reasons to be truths in our daily practice still today. Looking back, I realize ignorance and inexperience played a major part. Not that many of us wanted to be ignorant but for most of us it was our upbringing where we were always told how and what to think and that we shouldn’t question things. So, for most of our lives we walk blindly and do as we were told.

Now, as some of us are awakening, we find the reasons no longer valid and that the “Why” is not more important than the “how”. How do we begin to move forward in the newness of our day-to-day? How do we take those lessons we’ve learned and start to utilize some of the tools and resources that we now find that we have?

At the moment we contemplate the tools and resources that we find that we have, we recognize that they are more like inclusive road maps that we have been given access to. I use the term “inclusive” because many of them come from the inside. The tools we have gives us the ability to read the maps, the resources help us to take the journey within the map. The lessons keep us on the right roads on the map. I start to see that we are the map. The thoughts or mindset our tools. The resources our bodies which make manifested actions from our thoughts or mindset as well as those that help us to manifest the experiences on our journey.

The one thing 2017 made clear for me was to seek knowledge. That knowledge expanded our thoughts and mindset. And that knowledge proved itself one thing over time, and that there is nothing new under the sun and some of our teachers of this knowledge have been life bringers, some guides, some healers, some gurus, some mystics, some prophets, some messengers, and such but we’ve refused to obtain much of this knowledge mostly because of their source. We don’t realize that we all come from ‘the’ Source and have been the source. I don’t think we come to understand that each of us are the Source; a form of it anyway. Every single one of us holds a part of the Source within us, the Source is expressed through us and we all play a part of one another’s existence making us REsources. Knowledge comes from Source and reaches us through other sources to complete the knowledge of Source.

It’s like being lost and handed a map, a GPS locator, some rope, a hammer, or whatever and not using it because it came from Walmart or CVS and not Macy’s or Nordstroms. My hopes, prayers, and meditations are upon us utilizing ALL of our tools, resources, sources and the Source to move into our higher selves as a universal collective.

As with any thing expressed or experienced, I pray for many things going into 2018.  But mostly, I pray that my children are aware of the knowledge within and that they go to Source and when Source sends to them other sources that they utilize that resource. I pray that they are better people and parents than I was. I pray that the things that I learned in life have been a resource to them and that I shared enough with them to the extent that they may not have to experience any of those things; but if they do, I pray that they know exactly what to do. I hope that the example that I currently set for them makes them want to expand their level of consciousness every day and that they let nothing stop them from achieving all that they came here to do. I pray that my suns know that they are KINGS even when they aren’t acting KINGLY. I pray that they know they are loved without conditions and that I know them to be GREAT even when they are not.  I pray that they know that their actions do not define them. I pray that my suns know that no matter who they are that I will always love them. I pray that they know that Source loves them more than I ever could. I pray that when they fall they know how to get up. I pray that as the going gets tough that they know that they are tougher.  I pray that every day that they wake that they’ll try again.

This is what 2017 taught me, gave me, healed me from and allowed me to experience. Now, let’s move into 2018 with gratitude and gratefulness!

 

 

 

 

 

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This year, the Kai Mann blog will post every 1st and 3rd Monday of the month.  Stay tuned, I’ve got some amazing experiences, thoughts, and ideas that I want to share with you. If you like what you read, do me the honor of sharing it with anyone that you believe that it will resonate with. You can also check out the Kaiology Mann YouTube channel for videos and please do subscribe. I appreciate you and stand with you in the building of your 2018. Let’s get it!

 

 

Reset or Reboot


I like my privacy so much so that even though I work on the 4th floor I use the bathroom on the 3rd floor because there are less offices on that floor which means less people in the bathroom. (That’s just the precursor) Well, yesterday I walked down the stairs to the 3rd floor and down to the end of the hall to the restroom and handled my business. The next thing I knew I was opening the door inside the stairwell to the 4th floor only I wasn’t sure of where I was when I did. For about 2-3 seconds I was lost. I didn’t recognize the hallway and then I did. When I realized that I was now on the 4th floor about to enter the office to where I work, I walked in.

If any of you know me, you know that my mother suffered from alzheimers for over twenty years and had been diagnosed around the age of 53. I’m 49. Well anyway, of course that was the first thought that entered my puzzled mind as I opened the door to the office. My face must’ve been still puzzled when a co-worker asked me if I was okay. I told her what happened and she said I do that all of the time driving to work. I said “Yes, I’ve done it driving lots of times too” but I guess you can do it walking as well, it’s just that it has never happened to me before.” Even still, I chose to go with that instead of the alzheimers theory.

This morning when I got up I thought about the events that occurred the day before in between thoughts of other thoughts. Suddenly I became aware that my thoughts have been all over the place for a few months some finished and some unfinished; and that maybe yesterday’s event was a reset or reboot. I began to think about how many times we go through life on auto-pilot ending up somewhere we know but for some reason can’t recognize only because we have no clue of how we got there. Funny thing is, I’ve been in what I thought was a state of “mindfulness” trying to be mindful of all my intentions and forgetting to be mindful of the moment.

In my day to day any moment that I have in between work (theirs, mine, and the others) I try to stay on top of things and utilize every moment to do something else. The only problem with that is that I am not making time for myself. I’m bombarding myself with everything that I have to do while missing the moments to appreciate the things that I have done and where I am at now; physically, spiritually, and mentally. All I know is, I’ve got to do better. Yesterday’s wake up call leads me to believe that I need to harness the ‘Power of Now‘. I think this weekend I’ll take the time be still.

 

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the Sweet Spot


I just want to get to the Sweet Spot

but you can’t get there

without ‘growing’ through

the rough patches

life…boy,

sometimes my Heart

gets full

I want to get it

right

so bad

and when I don’t

I want to retreat

but I’m trying

so hard to do

something

different

even with things testing

my resolve

needless to say

I get some right

and I get

some

wrong

but I told myself

I’ma keep trying

something in me won’t

let me go

pull the covers up

over my head

like I know

the Sweet Spot

is close

Do you think that too?

My Gift To You


There’s more than enough

they make us think its not

so they control

us

everything that we do

can be bought

but shouldn’t be

Each one of us is different

unique, in our own way

our coding ain’t our DNA

If we could reinvent the wheel

because we are so different

there is no competition

Never want what’s not

yours

Be happy with what

you’ve got

because

no one else

has it.  (Merry Christmas)~KaiologyInk #Kaism #Kai2pointO

RISE


When you tell people

who you are

sometimes you’ll be

tested

Are you really who you say

some want to see

if you’ll fail

like them

we don’t have to do that

to one another

All we have to do

is lift each other up

because

as we lift

one another

we both RISE

***KaiologyInk***

Sensitivity


Not letting boys express their feelings when their little leads them to imbalance. When they’re older either they fight women or they are way too sensitive. Allow people to be who they are. Correct or adjust the things done wrong with what’s right from the point of realization. ~ #Kaism #Kai2pointO #KaiologyInk

Again


It’s time for some upbeat

music

I’ve been solemn

far too long

I want to laugh

again

throw my head

past my shoulders almost

hitting myself in the

back

face toward

the ceiling

that was some good

ole’ laughter

not even

sure what

it was about

but I remember

how

it made me feel

I don’t ever remember

laughing like

that before

or since

but I know

that I want to laugh

like that

again.

~Kaiology

Kai Mann © 2014

#Kaism #Kai2pointO

 

You Get Used To It


Sometimes you have to do

stuff

that you don’t like

but it’s profitable

for

you

you get to experience

something you

wouldn’t have

if you didn’t

it doesn’t always

feel good

in the beginning

a little disproportionate

til you grow and expand

and begin

to

fill in

places

you were

lacking

or

not as full

you get used to

it

not in a way

that’s repetitive

but in a way

that you

want to be

uncomfortable

and you

don’t

mind

because you want to see

what’s on the other side

~ You Get Used To It, Kai Mann © 2014

#Kaism

Times up


All

it seems like all

their times to go

are now

they are leaving here

I contemplate

sometimes

how close

mine

is

~Kai2pointO

Times Up, Kai Mann © 2014