The InkMann Press–Self Love & Self Growth


The InkMann Press Series- Self Love & Self Growth

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Recently I had someone ask me what my 2016 mission was and I was happy to say that my Life’s mission has not changed. Self-love and Self-growth have been the glue holding me together for most of my life. Even at a young age I had an appreciation for self development and understood that I had to be an advocate for my own growth. My goal has been to learn, grow, expand and excel on every level. Although I’d have to admit that I am not a traditionalist I am learned by way of spirit; A lifelong student of sorts but at the same time, a teacher. In learning to love myself, I have learned new ways to love others.  Often times I’m encouraged to share pieces of my experiences as the way that I see things sometimes can be different.  It’s funny because I thought we all think different since we all come from different perspectives. Anyway, in retrospect I decided to share, and thus the InkMann Press Series was created.

 

In the beginning I found myself on a quest to transcend any previous images that I had for myself. I wanted to write about how I challenged the innermost parts of me to go beyond the superficialities of life into something deeper. In previous blog posts I wrote with references to mastering yourself, learning from your lessons, letting go of ego, and forgiveness. I chose to write on these areas because they can all effect positive change. Letting go of old and outdated thinking patterns gives way to new tools that we can use to heal and to forgive ourselves. I realize that the moment we learn who we are and what we can do, we are able to increase and expand our potential.

 

Writing has been my passion since I was about twelve years old. It has been the way that I have communicated with life. My bond to writing comes from a need to release, and sometimes purge. In either case, my hope is that my writing will either water or plant a seed to inspire growth and change in the heart of one who needs it most.

 

Writing is an intimate gift. It is the formation of letters to make words that bring a connection between it and the reader. It’s a transformation of energies to bring a specific level of understanding.  My intention with The InkMann Press Series has been to inspire and motivate others to cultivate their own self awareness, self love, and self growth.  Remember, like minds, light minds.

 

If you have been inspired to pursue your passion, forgive, let go, move forward, or anything of the sort you know that it takes work. Being willing alone is not enough. There are many who will say “its grind time” but never end up grinding because grinding is synonymous with work. Work that they never anticipated doing. And because work implies tasks, jobs, duties, assignments, and projects they forgo the effort. For those of you who tackle the work relentlessly to work on yourself to improve your way of life, kudos to you.  Your strength is impeccable. It is only the minds of strong people who are willing to hold themselves accountable, stay the course, and do the work. It is you who truly understands that to be great you must be strong, and that strength never comes from the outside it comes from within.

 

Thank you for coming over to the Kai Mann blog to read the InkMann Press Series. May you be strong in all that you do so that you will inevitably increase your potential at every level. Now, go be GREAT!

InkMann Press Series ~ Divine Order


I’ve been taking a part my life lately and I can see how things would’ve been different if I chose a different path. Although I’ve come to the conclusion that I’ve made some serious sacrifices, my belief is that the reward will be in line with my purpose. In the end I know that the fruit will bear witness to the sacrifice. As a matter of fact, I believe that my life is in Divine Order.

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When I began to take a part the fabric of my life I saw first how I’ve moved in the world. I saw how I’ve mastered the skill of detachment. A gift given to me when I was about two years old and have since perfected.  Many people would not see being detached as a gift but a flaw. A character flaw no doubt because most people associate being detached with being aloof or an unloving act. That couldn’t be farthest from the truth. When someone detaches from you it doesn’t mean that they don’t love you, it just means there is something more at work.

When we realize that there is something more at work we can see that every one of us on the planet has a specific job to do.  Each job comes with different tasks as well as different set of skills needed to carry out the purpose or plan.  The job or purpose of some seems to lack value when you look at them individually, but when you take a look at it as a whole you’ll see that it is all part of a bigger plan.

There have been times when I for sure knew what the plan was and drove head long towards the mark. Then there were times that I felt like I was losing or as if what I was doing was wrong. But when I looked deeper I was able to see the vision with purpose in mind. The doubt has since subsided and now I am willing to look ridiculous to get something I’ve never had but I know that I want.

Since I’ve been dissecting myself, I’m finding the intricacies of how I work, and how I operate best. I could not have done this work without going within to that deep place inside.

In the beginning that deep place inside felt alone  and  I didn’t understand fully why it needed to be that way. Once I reconciled that I needed to be alone, I knew that I would have less distraction and could work on me and put my energy and focus into me. That’s when I began to feel differently. I sought the knowledge of self so that I could get back to self. The self I had lost through trial and error. While alone, I dealt with the things that could’ve left me scarred forever, feeling guilty and ashamed. Especially at times when I wasn’t as strong and positive as I had always appeared to be.  But, no matter how hard it was I was determined to do it. I was determined to deal with my issues for my future self and for the future people that would get to experience me because I now wanted to give my best self to the world.

As I sat many times before, I questioned what the best me would look like and what that person would have to offer. Then it came to me that before I could offer anything to the world, I first needed healing. Healing from all of the things that has happened to turn my world inside out, a healing that only comes from the core.  The kind of healing that you can only get from forgiveness. Not the forgiveness of anyone else but you. A required forgiveness from within.

Most of us hardly ever think to forgive ourselves for things that we’ve done to us; but we even forget to forgive ourselves for things that others have done to us, or things that we have allowed to happen to us. Most of all, we need to forgive ourselves for the things that almost destroyed us and kept us from moving to a new dimension. Once we have done that, then and only then can we start to become our best selves.

That too would not be easy. but the first step to forgiving was to deal with all of the issues. Although uncomfortable I had a need to get down to the core of the issue because I knew that issues that weren’t dealt with would cause discomfort. The mere fact that something would cause discomfort is a clue that I must not only look at it but I had to do my best to find a way through it. When I began to work through my issues I began to strengthen my core. My foundation worked to become rock solid because I always wanted to do my best.

Most people think Divine Order is a perfect life without mistakes or flaws but that is so untrue. Divine Order is a continual process that allows for mistakes as well as correction. Divine Order is the process in which it takes from conception until the return to spirit. It is all Divine Order since it all is of the spirit.

InkMann Press Series ~ The Weekend


PicsArt_11-23-08.43.31Today I was going over my weekend in my head and I wasn’t certain how it had gone.  After thinking about the plans that I had set for the weekend, I realized that I had done everything I set out to do. Although everything went as planned it was my mulling over my intentions that made me feel like something was missing. In reflecting over the events of the weekend I came across some weak spots; the kind of weak spots where you know for certain that you could’ve done better.  My instant response was  for me to be disappointed for a moment but I knew I couldn’t stay and needed to change my thinking so I told myself that I had to do better the next time.

I truly feel proud as I realized that I could change the tone of my life by changing the conversation that I have with myself. And I am excited to know that with small changes you can have big victories and in turn get everything in life that you are working hard for. I often times have to remind myself like many I have a ways to go but it’s not as far as I think. And I know for sure that it’s the staying the course that will help you grow.

I must be transparent and admit that I have schisms at times, but who doesn’t. I’ve seen those schisms appear when the Universe has granted me the things I’ve stated that I wanted most, as well as what I convinced myself that I could handle.  I think the problem was that I wasn’t fully aware of all the necessary things that I’d have to do to get it, keep it, and maintain it.

I’ve always said that I wanted to be in a space where I’m able to grow and reach my fullest potential. But I never counted on having to be taught, chastised, or challenged. It’s through this entire growing process that I’ve learned how to put my ego in check and put things into perspective, and lead with wisdom.

I recognize my own human frailties and realize that if you have a vision for yourself allowing ego to rise up and stay will get you nowhere and keep you stuck right where you are.

You ever have someone try to talk to you about you but you’ve been doing you for so long that your schisms have become habits? You don’t even know that you have these schismatic habits until someone pulls your coat tail and you’re face to face with yourself. It’s those times that you’re forced to really look at you, and all that you do.

When you’re walking in ego and your habits are called into question your feelings get hurt and you feel like your toes have gotten stepped on. Usually one of two things will happen; you’ll either go off on the person that you feel stepped on your toes and act like they’re wrong for doing so. Or you’ll let it burn for about 3 seconds, swallow, and then take a look at what they’re saying from a different angle. The key is to always go outside of yourself to feel what they see. Their response to you might have something to do with what ‘you’ do and how ‘you’ do it. I had to admit that when others tell you about you it doesn’t always feel good. But in fact that is what is needed some times. Now the question is; what will you do? Hopefully the answer is that you’ll tell the ego to go sit down somewhere, take the information as it is given, find out where the issue comes from, release it, and change the behavior?  If you don’t, ego will leave you in places you didn’t want to be. Places you look up from many years later to see past opportunities not taken. When we know better we should do better.

All of that is what I got from my weekend when I recognized some of the weak spots that had taken place and why they had taken place. You’re probably wondering why I was going over my weekend looking for weak spots in the first place.  I vowed about eight months ago that I wouldn’t do anything else half way again. No matter where I am in life I want to always strive to better myself in every area.  The truth is I have a new found respect for self improvement and doing the work that makes the work the best work that can ever be done.