In the past
I’ve been afraid
Afraid to say “I need more”
thinking that you’d
think I was weak
Been afraid to be ‘happy’
thought I didn’t
deserve it
not really
I never said it
to myself
at least not out loud
but all of my
actions said so
carrying old wounds
scars
bruises
and
bites
like a wounded SOULjah
Every piece of negativity
stuck to me
but I wouldn’t
allow myself
to feel it
so I wore it
like a badge of HONOR
today I’m scraping off
dead skin
and picking sores
I know it sounds gross
it is
I’m letting myself
feel
and
deciding what I
want to do with that emotion
by evoking some
personal healing
“Heal thyself”
is all I
can think
of
it’s not easy though
you have to tell on
yourself
to yourself
be HONEST
and deal from a different
level
you gotta open yourself
more than you ever
have
checking with you
to see how you
feel
so you don’t
get lost
Been lost
a lot
too old for that
don’t have
long enough
for it
either
But I now choose
“Happy”
I remind myself when I forget. ~ KaiologyInk
#Kaism #Kai2pointO
